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video || second chances
[The recent post made by WTF (or WoTF) has finally prompted Kushina to make an entry again, addressing this world at large and the people in it. Or at least those that can see this.
First, a deep breath.]
I don't know if anybody has been thanked for all the effort, for putting their lives on the line to save this world by those of us who don't remember how bad it was. There were people who made this place better for everyone and went back in time. It still sounds ridiculous to me and kind of impossible but this world is good at making impossible things possible, isn't it? [Like bringing people back to life.
Minato was good at it too. Space-time and doing impossible things.]
So... thank you. [At the end, her voice nearly cracks and she bows her head before lifting it again.
Now. Her smile is sad.]
It seems like we can go home soon, huh? That's good. We should go home because that's where we belong. Even if we have a choice to stay, we should go home in the end. So many people have fought for us to do just that. They're still fighting. If we don't go home, isn't it just like scorning those people and all their efforts? Isn't it forgetting who we are?
Don't be so selfish about wanting to stay here. There's a million other people in different timelines and worlds that don't. You should all work hard too to overcome your weaknesses so you're not stuck here anyway. There's people who do want to go home but they're going back to a place worse than this. Because it's home! Even if it's going back to their own death or being alone!
Even if it means losing everything here that is precious...
[A long, pregnant pause and Kushina finishes with a question after shaking her head a little.]
How many of you were given a second chance by being here?
[She closes the journal immediately after.]
First, a deep breath.]
I don't know if anybody has been thanked for all the effort, for putting their lives on the line to save this world by those of us who don't remember how bad it was. There were people who made this place better for everyone and went back in time. It still sounds ridiculous to me and kind of impossible but this world is good at making impossible things possible, isn't it? [Like bringing people back to life.
Minato was good at it too. Space-time and doing impossible things.]
So... thank you. [At the end, her voice nearly cracks and she bows her head before lifting it again.
Now. Her smile is sad.]
It seems like we can go home soon, huh? That's good. We should go home because that's where we belong. Even if we have a choice to stay, we should go home in the end. So many people have fought for us to do just that. They're still fighting. If we don't go home, isn't it just like scorning those people and all their efforts? Isn't it forgetting who we are?
Don't be so selfish about wanting to stay here. There's a million other people in different timelines and worlds that don't. You should all work hard too to overcome your weaknesses so you're not stuck here anyway. There's people who do want to go home but they're going back to a place worse than this. Because it's home! Even if it's going back to their own death or being alone!
Even if it means losing everything here that is precious...
[A long, pregnant pause and Kushina finishes with a question after shaking her head a little.]
How many of you were given a second chance by being here?
[She closes the journal immediately after.]
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But it's the end of his reply that has her tensing up. Not saying a word.
For a long time -- longer than polite, really. If she's tactless it shouldn't be a surprise she slips up in her manners.
Her voice is low and it's lost some of the edge that had been there in the initial post and even in her responses thus.]
I was.
Of course it was for me too. I'm here too, aren't I? I wouldn't say that to everyone else and not have it meant for me too.
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Sometimes, the lessons we've learned in our own lives [we; all of us] turn up in the advice we give to other people.
[sometimes it's the right advice, sometimes it's not-- but maybe its appropriateness matters less to us than the act of sharing it]
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Isn't experience and the lessons learned meant to be shared with others? Especially in a community of people we care about.
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But that means we have to be willing to learn from them, too. [a sharp whew of expelled smoke] Otherwise, it's not really sharing.
So we say, "I'd like to stay, but I can't even consider that option" -- not, "none of you should consider it".
No one cares to be called selfish, especially by someone who might as well be a stranger. You really want to share an experience? Tell them about your own selfishness.
[And maybe someone will see themselves reflected in you, for better or worse. That's "sharing".]
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But she meant it.]
I am selfish. I want to stay here as much as anybody that's said so to me. But I still know I'm not supposed to be in a place like this.
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So do I. I couldn't even consider it.
[pause] What makes you want to stay?
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The people. The friends I've made and the friends I've yet to make. The people I could meet, I could help, I could get to know. The experiences to share and learn from each other.
The second chance I didn't deserve but got anyway. That's what makes me want to stay.
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[But how precious they can be.
"Second chance" could imply a change in perspective or life's path-- but something about Kushina's personality leads him to suspect it means ... she has already died, or thinks that she must.]
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She chose to accept her death instead of fight it so the fact that she got that second chance over someone that couldn't accept it.
Saori... deserved that chance. Minato did too even if he accepted his death too for the safety of the village and for Naruto.]
Not by the people that ask for them.
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Isn't that what chance is? [a pause] We say fate is "cruel" or "kind"-- but that's not really true, is it? Life just is as it is.
There's no "why". You got a second chance. Some people don't. Does it really matter whether or not we asked for it? The only meaning in a second chance is how we spend that time. [his tone, always even, softens] It sounds like you spent it pretty well.
[And if some people see staying in Luceti as an extension of that second chance-- well, how can they be faulted for that?]
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Finally, finally celebrating Naruto's birthday for the first time. Meeting Naruto's friends. Making her own friends. Continuing her life here and being happy even if she didn't ask for it. Being happy for the borrowed time she was given since it put her in a place with Minato and Naruto.
For having such crappy luck most of her life, this overwhelms Kushina when she thinks about it. When her life in Luceti invades her mind.]
I did... and that's why I know it's time to go back. [Now addendum that she neglected in her post, a new insight come to life.]
For me. I can't be selfish anymore and choose to stay here. What if me being here means people from my world are going to come back? I still think everyone should go home and nothing is going to change my mind about that, but I can't be mad at someone for wanting to stay.
I probably said it wrong. My mouth gets away from me a lot when I'm frustrated. Hearing that we have a choice now just makes everything harder for everyone and maybe someone who asked for a second chance would know what to do with it better than I would.
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["Borrowed time" -- Ginko might use that phrase to describe his whole life.
In truth, for all her haphazard delivery, there's something Ginko finds almost comforting about her viewpoint. Dogged dedication to the good of the whole, self-sacrifice, accepting the inevitability of death with grace: that's his mother-tongue. And while he learned, another lifetime ago, to sympathize with the idealism of pirates and heroes and Lucetians with the physical or supernatural power to truly effect great changes in their worlds...
... it isn't in his nature to defy something like this. As unfair as it is, as tragic as it is, as much as he would support the decision of certain villagers (Xion) to make a home here-- returning home is ultimately a restoration of the natural order.
He just wants to be quiet, and grieve.]
If I can sympathize with those who want to stay, understand their feelings-- that's not something I already knew. It's something I learned from living here.
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There's a lot to be learned here from a lot of different people. Not just life lessons either but their stories.
Every life has a story, a beginning and an end. Where does Luceti fit in that story?
[When it won't even be remembered]
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He used to wonder the same thing about Luceti. But now the question has been flipped on its head.] That question might've been easier to think about when we knew we'd forget.
[It was just... philosophical. Something they had no choice about, just like vanishing home. But now...]
[a sigh that's tired to the roots]
I guess that's why it's so important to live in the present. One day at a time.
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It is important, but the future is important too.
[The other part takes a bit longer to sink in, especially since when it comes to going home that part influences a lot of her opinions. For her, it still doesn't really matter if she keeps her memories or not since when she leaves Luceti she leaves life behind her.
But for someone like Naruto, who she knows is alive. Shikamaru, Lee, Aang, Saori... everyone who was here.]
When we knew?
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In my own world, I remembered absolutely nothing about this place. [It was like it never happened. Not even hints in dreams.] But that won't be the case, this time.